C'est la vie

最近生活得非常没有规律。睡到自然醒，吃早餐，看电视，之后想做什么就做什么，想去哪里就去哪里。真是名副其实的活在自己的世界。但这也没有什么不好。因为以后应该没有什么机会过如此悠哉闲哉的生活。所以，不要太在意我最近的反常。

I don't know what's going on; I'm just plain frustrated.
I hate the ugliness of this world.
I hate the worries of life.
I hate the troubles that surface from no where in life.
I hate what reality brings.

I recall the times when I knew nothing about it.
I recall the times when I could have shunned away from it.
I would rather view it at a distance than to get myself to where it is.
I knew the outcome but I chose to grab a hold on it.
I guess it's just the consequences.
It haunts me every now and then.
I force myself to move forward but I fall every now and then with each step I take.
There is no turning back and there's no moving forward. It's such a tragedy to realise I'm still walking in circles after so long.
T_T 我需要的不只是一剂强心针.